After enjoying a nice catered meal, several couples in the church were chosen to play the “newlywed” game (even though the majority of them had been married for 10 years or more). Since my husband and I had been chosen last year, we knew we were “safe” and looked forward to being in the peanut gallery this time around.
As the questions were asked, David and I would occasionally look at each other and quietly answer the questions amongst ourselves, just to see how accurate we would have been. We were doing pretty good, for the most part, but then it happened - two questions were asked that basically ruined the rest of my night...
A question for the men: “What class would you be most likely to send your wife to?I was immediately thinking David would say “driving class,” seeing as how I am horrible at directions and feel very uncomfortable driving long distances by myself; but, to my surprise, he said “housekeeping class.”
- driving class
- housekeeping class
- cooking class
What?! I admit I’m not the BEST housekeeper in the world, especially with 2 kids, 2 cats, and 1 husband to pick up after; not to mention how my time is eaten up with homeschooling, running errands, and planning and cooking meals. Sure, I have a hard time keeping the house dusted, the bathrooms cleaned, and there always seems to be a load of unfolded laundry sitting in the way somewhere. But, really..... it could be MUCH worse! At least my house is organized and I can usually find something if I need it. (Needless to say, I guess I kind of took offense.)
Then, the next question came. I don’t remember the exact wording, but I remember it had something to do with ways the wives irritate the husbands. Because of the answer David gave to the last question, I figured he would say it was the unfolded laundry basket sitting in the hallway. Instead, he air-typed on an imaginary keyboard and mouthed the word, “computer.”
Again came the, “What?!” I admit I am on the computer probably more than I should be. But, golly, why doesn’t he just understand that I NEED the computer. I NEED to write in my journals to help me process things. I NEED to update my blogs. I NEED to do research for therapies and treatments that come up, or for our homeschool curriculum. I NEED to do be online “chatting” with my friends so I don’t feel so alone here at home all the time. This Winter has been terribly hard on me, and I NEED.............
Oh crap - he’s right! I hate to admit it, but I’m addicted to this stupid computer, and I know it! Yes, all of the things above are true. I DO need to spend time on here to write, research, and stay connected with my friends. However, there also NEEDS to be a balance. I realiz now that the housework hasn't been getting done - not because I don't have the time to do it, but because I haven't MADE the time to do it. Instead, I've been spending all my time on here. Ugh! Why did he have to be right about this! Now, that means I really NEED to make a change - one that I don’t particularly want to make.
The next day, I listened to my conscience and didn’t spend much time on the computer, but I did take a little time to read an e-mail newsletter called “Encouraging Moments,” by Lorrie Flem. It’s a newsletter geared towards encouraging women in their choice to be wives, mothers, and homemakers; while also challenging us to strive for improvement in the areas we are lacking. A group of us gals (The Gabby Moms), who are reviewing products for Eternal Encouragement Magazine, were put on assignment this month to review this weekly e-newsletter.
Right off the bat, I liked the looks of the newsletter. The colors blended nicely, and the font was appealing. Then, I moved into the content and found that the author was speaking directly to women with a loving and encouraging tone - not with one that condescends. She even spoke directly to me in some instances, or so it seemed.
To quote Lorrie in the February 10th newsletter, she said...
The differences between a successful marriage and an unhappy one are:Hmmm.... #2 and #4 really stood out to me as a confirmation that a compromise was in order regarding my computer time. So, from then on, I have made it a goal to try and accomplish at least one or two household chores each day BEFORE spending an allotted amount of time on the computer. That way, chores still get done, and I still get my computer time. Kinda like a reward system. I am also in the process of weeding out several e-mail subscriptions that take up too much of my time. However, Encouraging Moments will not be one of them, thanks to the positive tone and helpful advice it gives.
- living life "around" your disagreements
- taking a "team" attitude toward compromise
- loving in spite of differences
- understanding and empathy for your husband's position
- knowing that quietly talking about differences can strengthen the relationship and improve intimacy
- knowing that avoiding conflicts doesn't make them go away"
For some additional information, the newsletter is laid out in various sections. First, there is a “short and sweet” moment with the author. Then, it moves into information about a “drastic discount,” things that were said on Facebook this week, Lorrie’s schedule, a Chick Flicks for Mom video, specific news and announcements regarding the affiliate magazine, and then finishes up with a “timely tip” to share.
To sign up for this FREE newsletter, go to the website for Eternal Encouragement Magazine (http://www.homemakingwithteach.com/) and enter your e-mail address in the box that says, “Sign up for our e-mail newsletter.” For those interested, you can also find subscription info on there for the magazine itself.
Disclaimer: I reviewed Encouraging Moments as an official member of The Gabby Moms blogging program for Eternal Encouragement magazine. I did not receive compensation for this post and all opinions are solely my own.